Tuesday, January 6, 2009

THE BIG UPDATE!

Ahh, loyal viewers, how I have neglected thee.

It's been too long my friends so here goes:

Christmas week was jam packed with excitement as I juggled work, playing and a visit from my brother, whom I hadn't seen since sometime around spring break of 2007.

I was playing Christmas week for the Abundant Living Faith Center. A large, large, large church located on the east side of El Paso, TX. Now, I won't get into details, but as most of you know I'm not the biggest fan of organized religion. That being said, I'm also not a big fan of biting the hand that feeds you, plus I appreciate the positive aspects and beneficial works that religious organizations provide. Ibso facto... I do it for the good of the community. Their Christmas show is second to none, consisting of roughly 300 cast members, a wire team from the same company that handles Cirque du Soleil, and a church that seats about 3500. It's a yearly thing for me, and I've been doing it long enough to not remember how long I've been doing it. All in all the show was seen by about 18,000 people in 2008, a new record for the church. If you're ever in town for the four days before Christmas, check it out.

My brother, the coolest cat this side of the Pecos, was in town for a week from December 23rd to the 30th, a week that went by way too fast. We spent some quality time playing video games, which as you all know is about as "quality" as my time gets. After Christmas week he was off to Chicago to meet up with his friends Jen and Paul whom he met during orientation for Teach for America a couple of years ago. For Christmas, we all pitched in and picked him up a lovely new Xbox 360 Pro, which means for the first time in his life he owns all the current gen consoles. Quite a feat if you ask me. My take wasn't too bad either, as I received Super Smash Bros. for the Wii from him. Before he had to leave we made sure he was filled with the best authentic Mexican food Las Cruces has to offer, which you all know you just can't find anywhere else. Thanks for the visit Chris, miss you, love you, see you soon. (above pic from my wedding, in which my brother acted as minister)


My final Christmas show ended around 9:30pm on Christmas Eve and from there it was back to Las Cruces to spend time with Crystal's family. We hosted Christmas at our house for Crystal's mother's side of the family. It was a most enjoyable evening, complete with the ritual White Elephant gift exchange and a traditional meal consisting of a variety of sides and a giant pot of menudo. A visit from Santa, a warm cup of coffee, and then off to bed once we bid goodnight to all. (shown, assorted aunts, cousins, the baby, and Pere Noelle)

Christmas day was the usual family runaround. I awoke a the asscrack of dawn to make a special Christmas delivery for a friend, I'd go into details but I refuse to spoil anyone's perception concerning the existence of the fat man. From there it was back to bed, then up again in time to be ready for a visit with Crystal's father John. We spent the rest of the morning and well into the afternoon filling up on turkey, ham, and conversation. Again, good food and time well spent with family.


We ran back home to unload gifts from the trunk and repack it with gifts for our next stop, my parent's place in Alamogordo. It's not to say we had sooooo many gifts that we had to make a stop, but when you're packing a car seat, a stroller, a diaper bag and assorted baby goodness, it doesn't leave much room for presents. We went to gas up only to discover that the gas at this particular station was the cheapest I've seen it in a very long time. Man alive, $1.19 a gallon. Boy will I ever miss you. Seven dollars later we were on the long road to home.

Alamogordo was that same as it's always been. It seems that for every business that opens or remodels, there are two that either go out of business or look like they belong in a Rob Zombie movie. At this point it's like polishing a turd. No offense to the hometown I love and grew up in, I just couldn't think of a better cliche to describe it. Turd polishing pretty much sums it up. If you disagree, you didn't grow up there. Either way, go Tigers...


Sooo there we are at my parents house, spending time with my brother, my sister's family, and my parents and pretty much just pissing the day away enjoy my mom's spiced cider and another double helping of meat. The selection consisted of deep fried turkey, slow cooked brisket, and succulent ham. I pretty much ate my share of all three, and your share. Belt loosened, we watched assorted Christmas movies, played some card games (which I totally sucked at btw), and drove home in time to sleep enough to work the next day.
(Mom snapping a photo of Chris and Caitlyn)
Worked the next day... bleh.

Friday night we returned to Alamogordo, again filled up on meat, and stayed overnight. On Saturday we lounged around and enjoyed the inch or so of snow that had fallen during the night. In true New Mexico fashion, it was gone by noon. Now keep in mind I did have to prioritize family and what not over computer time, so my blogging nuts had been for the most part castrated during this time. I'm not trying to make excuses, I'm just sayin'.

We returned on Saturday night to Las Cruces with my brother. From there it was a late night of gaming and a Sunday complete with a stop at the flea market. My brother and I had lunch at Sonic, which he can't get in Hawaii. It seems fair, no Sonic for him, no tropical island paradise for me. My parents came into town on Sunday night, so we spent some more time family-style and then they took him back with them to Alamo. On Monday Crystal, Caitlyn and I slept in, then later on that afternoon went back to Alamo for one last visit with my brother. On Tuesday the 30th it was back to work, and my parents accompanied my brother back to the airport in El Paso to see him off. That evening we visited our good friend Geoff and his mother for coffee and a quick exchange of gifts.

New Years Eve was spent at work during the day, at night we went to Crystal's mother's house for an impromptu party she was throwing. The food again was excellent, another testament to the idea that I married into the right family. We retired early for the baby's sake, returning home and cooking up a late night dinner for ourselves and my friend Geoff and his mother, whom we had invited over the night before.

I was off on New Years Day, but went into work for a few hours of overtime. Otherwise it was a mellow day.

The rest is as follows... work... dinner.... baby... sleep and/or playing World of Warcraft. Geoff had downloaded a trial of the new expansion of the game but unfortunately (and I know this only means something to half of you) you can't create a Death Knight unless you already have an existing level 55 character on you server, even with the trial. So the past few days I was helping him level his character from 45 on up. As of Saturday I had made it to 51, but life calls, and I know better at this point than to place computer time over family time.

So all in all it was a busy couple of weeks. The first section I simply couldn't help, it was a whirlwind of family, limited computer access, poor cell phone reception, and more driving that a newborn should be subjected to. This last week I was recuperating, and leveling a feral druid. I can't really justify that last part, but fuck it, if your feelings are hurt, come by the house and I'll give you a Twix™.

Many thanks to Serry and Tarah (names poorly changed to protect the innocent), who visited us this last Friday and Saturday. Serry's father got married on Saturday, and we wish him all the best in this newest chapter of his life. We were dog sitting while they were at the wedding, and while they may thank us, it's our pleasure if only to get a chance to spend time with good friends.

Plus they picked up our lunch at Chilito's, it's not really relevant, but talking about it makes me smile. I had the red enchiladas with red chile meat and an egg on top. Heavenly!

What else what else....

Saw a few movies, not the theater kind of course just on DVD. Crystal wasn't to impressed with Mama Mia or The House Bunny. I made sure I was on the computer at the time. Eagle Eye maintained our firm belief that Shia Labeouf is good enough an actor to make you forget you're watching Shia Labeouf. Hamlet 2 was excellent, go watch it. Meet Dave was standard modern-day Eddie Murphy comedy, mildly funny yet a little too tame with a splash of cheesy. Eddie Murphy still manages to be one of the best actors alive today, it's just often overshadowed by family friendly packaging and scripts which place him in roles which are often revisions of characters he's played before. We rented Pineapple Express today (Marisa, if you're out there, can't help but think of you when I see this movie) and laughed our asses off. Such a good movie. Lots and lots of tiny quotable snippets, which we all know is the best asset a comedy can have right? I saw it three times in the theater, and it still felt fresh on DVD. Good stuff. The only complaint I have is that for being "unrated", there was only about 2 minutes of extra material, and none of it moved beyond it's R rating.


The baby is doing great. She's beautiful, and not in that "she's mine so I have to say it" kind of way. She cries when she needs something, and stops when she gets it. It's about as good as we could have hoped in that department. No random endless crying, knock on wood. She's a little over two months now and growing like crazy. She's well into smiling, laughing, and carrying on conversations in whatever language she can muster. Every day you ask yourself how it's possible that so much could come from so little ... /smirk
(mom and Caitlyn shown)
Life is good.

Miss you all, love you all,
Jimmy
P.S. Here you go, for your adoring pleasure.






Monday, December 22, 2008

FPOD - I know it's two in a row, but I couldn't resist.


And you think you've got problems!

This week is a busy one friends... Christmas is fast approaching, my brother comes into town tomorrow, and it's solid work/play from now until 11pm Christmas Eve. Joy! I'll probably post up a Christmas Card at some point because there's no way in hell I'll be able to mail them at this point, true to form.

More to come, enjoy your Monday night.
Jimmy

Saturday, December 20, 2008

Funny Picture of the Day - Why I missed so many questions in chemistry.

Here we are with the Periodic Table of Awesoments. Review it, memorize it, love it. Quiz on Monday.

Any suggestions on what they left out. It seems for the most part complete to me. I'm having a hard time bashing any one particular Awesoment.

Good stuff. Take a quick peek or click on the picture for the full on pic. Try not to get too overwhelmed with awesome.



Wednesday, December 17, 2008

WTF - Online Chat Assistance


Ok so we were shopping for our Christmas tree (the end result being this beautiful, authentic looking, flocked number, 1640 tips baby!). This last weekend we determined that a tree was necessary, not because Caitlyn is here (because lets face it, she's a baby and she won't remember shit), but because this year Christmas is at our house for Crystal's side of the family. Granted everyone does their own thing on Christmas Day, but for Christmas Eve it's a fun family gathering complete with a traditional southwestern feast unmatched anywhere. So since we'll be playing host to the social event of the season, we need a tree. Mind you we already had a tree, but it's a clearance item I got off the Internet for thirty bucks with no tax and free shipping. Crystal hates it. I think it's campy. It's about six feet tall, pre lit, and has fiber optics as well. It sits on a stand that rotates the tree while playing Christmas music (not the good kind, just the beepy electronic kind).

So anyway, I'm on the website trying to find out our local store hours because we were trying to accomplish all this with our holiday shopping on Sunday. I find the phone number for our local store and notice on the store hours list that it closes at 8pm. I call at 7:40 to find out if, what with the holidays and all, our store has seasonal hours which might have provided us with the time we would need to make the trip and pick up a tree. Much to my chagrin, the automated store answering system picks up and I go through the usual motions of pressing 1, then pressing 1, and then pressing 0. Because we all know it takes a minimum of three useless button presses to find out the most basic of information about a business.





Now where do I transform from a mild mannered whippet to Wendy? (see right, then google Wendy Whippet, I'm not doing the work for you, you lazy bastard)

I'll tell you when! When I jump through the obligatory hoops only to have the phone ring for 2 straight minutes with no answer. "A fluke" I think to myself. So I do it again, with the same sad end result.

Now at this point a friendly little chat window opens up on my screen. Ah yes, the online assistant, ready to help. For the most part I usually believe that these robotic little helpers are simply feeding me scripted answers based on the key words of my questions and responses. I'm still pretty sure this is true, but in this particular instance I was actually chatting with a live human. I know this because I was somewhat irate, and with the gift on anonymity on my side, I was not the least bit afraid to make this known. It all turned out pretty humorous, but remember my name was changed to protect the innocent.

Here is my conversation.... verbatim.

Chat InformationPlease wait for a product specialist to respond.

Chat InformationYou are now chatting with 'Ashley'

Ashley: Welcome to Home Depot. How may I assist you today?

Ricardo: Quick question Ashley... I'm calling my local store and though it is open, nobody is answering the phone. I am very upset about this, and would like some answers. Their number is (575)521-1327

Ashley: What time zone do you reside in?

Ricardo: Mountain.

Ricardo: They close at eight o'clock. I was calling at around seven forty. I just wanted to know their holiday hours.

Ashley: I'm not sure. They close at 8:00 P.M. on Sunday.

Ashley: I do not believe the hours change for the holiday hours.

Ricardo: It's not really a problem, I just don't know why nobody answers the phone during store hours.

Ricardo: If they're open they should answer.

Ashley: I'm sorry but I am not sure.

Ricardo: But apparently they are satisfied with not receiving our business.

Ashley: Again, I apologize for the local store not answering. You may wish to call customer care for local store issues and voice your concern. The number is 800-553-3199, option 5. They are open Monday-Friday from 9:00 A.M. -8:00 P.M Eastern time.

Ricardo: I know it's not your fault but it's a waste of both of our time to be in this situation. Why leave the customer sitting on the phone after pressing 1, then pressing 1, then pressing 0, only to have it ring for two minutes.... just a waste.

Ricardo: I see that customer care is open 9-8, does that mean THEY stop answering the phones at 7:40? If it does let me know now and save me the trouble.

Ashley: As I stated the customer care line is open Monday-Friday, from 9 A.M- 8 P.M. Easter time.

Ricardo: Easter time? Wait, I have to wait until Easter? That's just ridiculous....

Ashley: I'm sorry but I had already stated Eastern time prior. I'm sorry for the spelling error.

Ashley: Is there anything else I can assist you with?

Ricardo: Well, unless you can help me find a Christmas tree at a Home Depot that's open, then no. But thanks for the effort.

Ashley: I'm sorry but I do not have access to local store inventory.

Ashley: I hope you have a happy holiday and take care.

Ricardo: You've been a good sport anyhow, happy holidays Ashley.

Chat InformationChat session has been ended by the product specialist.


So there you go, a little venting can go a long way. And I think I may just develop a fondness for strange complaints to online chat assistance, it makes for good blogging. Anyway, you all take care, and I'll see you soon.


Jimmy


Tuesday, December 16, 2008

A Week in the Life - Lazyness is next to Godliness... I think that's how it goes.


I could fill you with a veritable mountain of reasons why it's been a week since I've updated. Perhaps I was travelling around the world (I wasn't). Maybe I was sleeping in for seven days straight (more likely). Or maybe, just maybe I was seriously jonesin' for some Cheez-Its™ (we have a winner!). But for whatever reason, c'est la vie.

In all actuality it was an action packed week filled with more excitement than Randy Savage in a dumpster full of Slim-Jims™. The Juarez symphony had it's holiday concert, a quick and painless performance of Tchaikowsky's Nutcracker Suite, plus a couple of pieces we play every year that are always crowd favorites. You'll remember Danzon No.2 by Marquez from the Las Cruces Symphony's performance of the same piece the week before. Aside from that we played Strauss' Radetzky March (with audience participation [see video]), and Offenbach's Orpheo Overture. Offenbach's piece is famous in that you hear it anytime you see someone doing the can-can (yeah, that song).

I've linked them to some YouTube videos of those pieces, I'd embed them, but I fill you up with too much classical music as it is.

In addition, we made it to the mall finally for the ritual that is THE SANTA PHOTO. So there we were in a crowded mall, waiting in line. We made our way up to check out the "mandatory" photo packages - no personal cameras without minimum package purchase mind you. So one 5x7 and 4 wallets = $24.99. Ouch. I can only compare it to the "Free" Child's admission at the travelling circus. Be it Shriner's or Ringling Bros. or Gatti's or whatever, there's always a stack of free child coupons at every convenience store and Chuck e' Cheese's within a 100 mile radius. The catch of course is that when you get to the circus you'll pay close to twenty dollars for an "adult" admission, and then get subsequently wallet-raped by concession prices akin to multiplying the cost of a soggy hot dog at a Yankees game with the cost of a warm shit-beer at a Metallica concert.

What I'm saying is that twenty five dollars is a bit much for a set of photos I can have in an hour from Walgreen's for under fifty cents. But hey, we're new parents, so cha-ching pseudo-Claus... cha-ching.

On Sunday, we were at the company Christmas party. Good food, horrible parking, and some time with friends. My sister was in town with the kiddies, so we spent the afternoon with them at the mall, finishing the evening up with some hot chai at Barnes and Noble.

Yesterday we finally set up our Christmas tree. I'll add some photos later with another holiday post to include Caitlyn's Santa photo (which is so saturated with cute that you can taste it).

So, more to come I assure you, and you won't have to wait very long for it either. Take care and enjoy the week, see you all sooner than later.

Jimmy

P.S. I won't play any video games until I post ... you happy now?

/shakefist


Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Return of the Spider


Well, you probably remember this post which introduced us to a nice back and forth between a bill collector and a man with a plan. Well it seems the seven-legged spider in question has reared it's ugly head again, this time utilized in a math test by a fan of the spider.


Nice to see that this creative drawing has become a muse for some.

More to come.

Thursday, December 4, 2008

A Week in the Life - Brahms, Ravel, and Marquez.

Yes, another symphony week, this time local. I'll be here in the LC playing with the Las Cruces Symphony. The program contiains a great latin flavored piece by Arturo Marquez.

Danzon No. 2:



Followed by some nice romantic Ravel. The French composer excelled at impressionism and his music abounds with rich layers and effects that pull the heart strings. His suit from the ballet Daphnis et ChloƩ exemplifies his skills. Ravel's own health deteriorated to near breakdown from the amount of work the put in scoring the ballet which utilized a full ballet company, two choruses, and a large orchestra.

Suite from Daphnis et ChloƩ:



Lastly, the one and only Brahms Violin Concerto. Regarded by may as one of the more beautiful and difficult of the violin concertos, this will be performed by Augustin Hadelich. The concerto was written by Brahms for his friend and violin legend, Joseph Joachim. Augustin Hadelich won the Gold Medal at the Indianapolis Violin Competition in 2006. The competition is, for modern times at least, the bees knees of the violin world. Occurring only every four years, the competition is world reknowned. And since he won.....

His prizes include $30,000 in cash, a 24-carat gold medal, a four-year loan of
the 1683 "ex-Gingold" Stradivarius violin and Tourte bow, a Naxos label compact
disc recording contract, a gold Fleur-de-Lys bow made by Berg Bows and more than
40 concert engagements, including a domestic and international tour.

So he'll be playing on said violin for this weekend's concert. Here's a snippet of his performance in the competition.

Yeah he's pretty good.

So that's my week. I'll squeeze in some more later on.

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Best of the Web


Ahh.... so true.

Funny Picture of the Day - I always wondered what was inside these things...


And I always thought it was rolling balls and lasers. Truth be told a great deal of training and specialized breeding goes into each and every one of them.

Monday, December 1, 2008

Cash Cow?....Cash puppy?..... Ok then, Change Gerbil!!!1!!

Bling bling, Motherfather's!!

Awwww yeeeeeah, boooyeeeee. After some careful calculation, it seems that JRTW may turn a profit when it hits its one year anniversary in August of the 09'.

Given gross profit estimations based on fourth quarter advertising revenue results minus production costs, marketing costs, overhead, and labor. Jimmy Rules the World stockholders should see a net yearly profit of....



.33 ¢


Hmm.

Crap.

Does that even buy a stamp still?

Oh well, if you love it, you do it for free right!

Just like your mom!

That's right, that just happened. What are you going to do about it. Nothing is right.

If you want compassion, that was last week. Stay tuned.
Jimmy