WTF - Cup o' Noodles

For the love of God, is it really necessary to put 47% of my daily allowance of sodium into my Cup o' Noodles? It's bad enough that I'll choke down enough monosodium glutamate to kill a month's worth of dogs for a North Vietnamese family, but to suffer the added insult of added in salt is just preposterous! When it rains it pours indeed, Morton!

Now I'm all for a salty snack here and there, but c'mon, we're not exactly talking about pretzels or Chex Mix here. Is it really necessary for me to be plagued with hypertension just because I don't have time to make my own meal from scratch? Does my busy lifestyle automatically mean that my hasty meals must be inherently toxic? Nitrates, Hydrogenated Oils, Trans Fat (I'm talking to you Slim Jim, get on the bandwagon already), and a whole laundry list of ills evolved from a ravenous society which led to streamlined production, ultimately replacing traditional food preparation methods for fast-paced poisoning in shiny shrink wrapping.

Can't we take it down just one notch? I mean this shit is already beyond the median public perception of salty. The chips, the crackers, the nuts ... all precursors to the salty burn of dehydration. Would we really notice if you just chopped the sodium in everything by 20%? Wouldn't that cost you less? Probably not as I'm sure flavor is always more expensive than salt.

I swear to God if they keep this up we'll all be dead in *slurp* ten more years.
It's despicable *sip* and I won't stand for it!
You'll be sorry... starving a little gray rabbit! This is terrible! Me eating this stuff! How do you expect me to stomach this stuff?

..... hmm.

You know, this shit's actually pretty good.


I'll switch to the Organic Cup o' Gluten Free All Natural Free Range Hormone Free Grain Fed Noodles tomorrow.

Seacrest out!

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