FPOD - Efficient. Simple. Pants-pissingly funny.

Here at Jimmy Rules the World, we value the whole joke (and by we I mean me and the half cup of garlic heart-clogger butter that came with my Papa John's™.

We score whole jokes based on an ultra-complex equation. Taking quantitative scores measured across the globe by a crack team of hilaritologists, we enter these numbers into a series of servers linked with underplayed Playstation 3 systems. Once we apply Euclid's algorithm, the resulting schedule presents us with a near-flawless cross-section of the real world laugh factor for said joke. Comprehensive, thorough, and trusted the world over.

What we look for:

• The substance - how well the dialogue is written.
  
• The delivery - the who of the joke. Were you monotone? Physically animated?
  
• The punchline - not necessarily but most often the funniest part.
  
• Ratio of the snowballing upcurve to the difficulty of execution.
• Acessibility and translatability. Will this joke work internationally? Does the punchline involve me subscribing to your western monotheism?
  
• Lack of agenda based underbelly - is this joke funny because you're trying to prove a point and/or win me to your cause?
• Viral spread - how fast your joke makes it from person to person. If you tell it now, will someone be telling it to you next week/month/year.

Now I'd like to assume that this was all true, because goddammit it sounds really good. But I haven't the time nor the audacity to assume that I'm in any place to judge funny. Like religion, war, history, and American Idol, its all a matter of perspective.

That being said, this is hilarious. Enjoy my friends.

Enemies.... burn in hell you douchenozzles.

As always,
Jimmy


Goodnight!